Obesity CURE!

From our correspondent at The Priory.

NOW, if like me you have recognised the obesity epidemic larding its way across the nation, you too can't cease to imagine how bad things will get without a cure. Well the cure is here. As if the desiese had come and gone... piff paff puff, well less puff.

Dr Arga Fercukinon, of the Schnallergnob Instute, Dertygerty, says

It is quite simple. We put the patients on a strict diet of nothing and made them run on a treadmill for hours on end. Only 5% of them crached into trees, which is amazing given that they were all showing definate side effects of the treatment. Some claimed to be hungry and others said they felt exhusted. Sometimes we have to live with the shorterm affects. That figure might rise to 10% in the longterm but it is hard to say.

When asked about something not so strict, such as a vegitarian diet, Dr Fercukinon was pessimistic.

Hitler was a vegitarian. This has certian side affects.

This certainly agrees with many theories that say vegatables cause cancer. But can this procedure cause cancer?

I seriously doubt it, wind can cause cancer but we run indoors.

Well that's my mind put at rest. So there you have it you lardy set of fat bastards...

By
Monty Nowort